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When you expect change, start from yourself

Mahatma Gandhi said, "you be the change you want to see in the world". Because virtues are universal, you might have heard the same words, possibly said in different ways, from different people. I wouldn't like to preach anyone, but several situations in the recent past compelled me to write this text now. However, I am not preaching anything. I am just trying to contemplate on Gandhiji's valuable words... for the benefit of myself and also for others. I however think that many many of these "others" will benefit from mulling over these words. However, when I say contemplate, I also mean putting action into it. By putting action to substantiate the contemplation, we all will primarily benefit ourselves because we will enjoy the resulting improved quality of life. And we will benefit our friends and families by putting less "expectation" or "load".

Change is always "uncomfortable". It doesn't come for free! The primary step is to "break" the barriers put by your ego i.e. to accept the need for your change. And the second step is to continue this acceptance despite the difficulties along the implementation i.e. perseverance. But the funny thing is that we see that the change is "difficult" only when we are the subjects. And we expect and even demand change in others very very often. We take the change for granted when someone else is the subject.

Once upon a time, a king wanted to visit all parts of his kingdom by foot. He started his journey and soon found it difficult to walk on the rough roads . He immediately ordered that all the roads in his kingdom be covered with leather! A wise man, hesitant to annoy king by giving any advise against the orders, finally dared to advise the king to rather cover his foot with leather! Luckily the king liked the idea, and invented shoes! Need I say how ineffective and expensive the first solution that king thought of was?

One could catergorize people who resist change into three types . One, who is unaware of the ego. Two, who is not willing to overcome the ego i.e. who is not willing to change himself. Three, who is willing to change others. Type one sounds like a harmless character, but effectively they resist change, although unkowingly. Type one people should practice self-assessment. The difference between type two and three is that two is not deliberate in demanding change in others, while three is. Two is like saying, "Oh, it is hard to change myself, but hopefully it doesn't hurt others. And hopefully others change". Three is like, "forget about me, first you need to change and let's deal with it". But types two and three should recall also that "what you give is what you get". You can't expect a golden ball to come back when you hit [the wall] with a rubber ball. Similarly, if you don't want to hurt yourself of the bouncing-back ball, you should resist hitting the ball in the first place, you can not expect the ball to resist bouncing-back.

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